A Life for a Life – The Night That Changed Everything
I’m going to do something a little different with this post. I’m going to include a short video that I will also be posting separately on social media that is directly related to this post.
Easter Sunday. It’s the day we decorate eggs and hide them for our kids to find. It’s also the day we eat more than our share of chocolate. But, what does it really mean; why do we celebrate it? More importantly, what does it mean to you?
For Christians, Good Friday is the day we honor the sacrifice Jesus made for us when he gave his life on the cross. Easter is the day we celebrate his resurrection. It’s the celebration of his victory over the cross and the grave, the event that became the foundation of the Christian church and the cornerstone of Christianity itself.
Christianity at Home
I grew up in a Christian home, so Easter should certainly be honored in my home today, right? Well, it’s not that simple. My father was the “fire and brimstone” type, so we heard a lot about how we’re going to hell if we didn’t do the right thing. It was a real struggle for him to say he loved us and I’m not sure I ever heard him say he was proud of me in any way. Our relationship became so strained, that I actually told my Mom if he was the example of what Christianity was, I wanted nothing to do with it.
Growing up in a Christian home also had some benefits that I’ll never take for granted. But, before I finish sharing that with you, I need to tell you this. Because I grew up in and around church and I had already gone through so much, I thought I had a good foundation. I thought I could handle anything life threw at me. I had handled it all up to that point anyway.
That was until I became involved in what became a toxic relationship. You don’t see it at first. It doesn’t change overnight, either. Before I met this man, praise and worship was a HUGE part of my life. It was where I found my strength. He didn’t see it that way though, and chastised me every time I listened to it. You see, he only listened to the old hymns.
Little by little, I stopped listening to praise music. Our relationship was still so new I was doing anything I could to gain his acceptance and love. He didn’t like the kind of church service I wanted to attend either. He refused to go with me and talked so negatively about them I eventually stopped going all together. So much for that strong foundation I thought I had, right?
I have to warn you, the next part of this story may be triggering for some, but I feel it needs to be told. If you have experienced similar trauma and feel the need to talk to someone PLEASE go to our Resource Page or contact the suicide prevention hotline at 1-800-273-8255. You don’t have to go through this alone!!
The Downhill Spiral
As the years went by, I became less of who I was and more beat down and broken in my spirit. Anxiety was a regular part of my life and I fell into a deep depression. Our relationship began to crumble while I fought with everything I had to keep it together.
We’ve all heard that communication is key in any relationship, right? Well, I tried to talk to him constantly, each time ending with me feeling worse about myself and the whole situation than when we started. I would feel lower than the dirt on the bottom of his shoes and would break down. Only when he knew I was broken, did he begin to treat me differently. He would always swoop in and make it all better.
This went on for years before I began to see the pattern. But, I still didn’t see it as the abuse that it was. Instead, I thought there was something wrong with me. So, I valiantly went on a personal quest to discover what that was!
Is there anyone reading this that has gone down that same path? At the time, I thought I was the only one going through what I experienced every day. I know today, that was never the case.
Never the Same
I honestly don’t know what I expected to happen, but no sooner than I finished saying those words, I got my answer. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a figure of a man appear in the passenger seat leaning toward me and felt an overwhelming love flood my soul. I knew without a doubt at that moment, that He was real, that He loved me, even when I didn’t give him a reason to, and that my life actually mattered….I actually mattered to God!!
I put the gun down, and immediately rededicated my life to Christ. From that moment on, I was no longer going to allow anyone to dictate what music I listened to, what church I attended, or how I served God with my life. I was never going to choose my relationship with a man over my relationship with God again!
Making that decision didn’t take me out of the hell that waited for me at home, but it did give me strength to get through it and a peace knowing I wasn’t walking through it alone. I began reading the New Testament and committed to finishing it, something I had never done before. As I did, I found a God who truly understood my suffering because Christ himself suffered.
Isaiah 53 says this about Jesus:
"My servant grew up in the Lord’s presence like a tender green shoot, like a root in dry ground. There was nothing beautiful or majestic about his appearance, nothing to attract us to him.
He was despised and rejected—a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care.
Yet it was our weaknesses he carried; it was our sorrows that weighed him down. And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God, a punishment for his own sins!"
Isaiah 53:2-4 (NLT)
Wait, what?? I had never been introduced to that Jesus before, “a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief.” God to me, was someone out of reach, someone looking down at me. God was someone who created life and law, someone to be revered, that was it!
I didn’t understand until I began reading the Bible, that Jesus never leaves us as we walk through our struggles because he’s been there himself. He knows what it’s like, and he went through it with no one at his side. He was denied, abandoned, betrayed, and alone, yet he STILL laid his life down for us.
That’s what makes this holiday so special to me. Good Friday is a reminder of how much God truly loves us. It is a reminder of how much He was willing to sacrifice for us, a people who have turned their back on him soo many times. Good Friday reminds me of how Jesus chose to endure suffering for us.
Isaiah continues with this:
But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins. He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed.
All of us, like sheep, have strayed away. We have left God’s paths to follow our own. Yet the Lord laid on him the sins of us all.
He was oppressed and treated harshly, yet he never said a word. He was led like a lamb to the slaughter. And as a sheep is silent before the shearers, he did not open his mouth.
Unjustly condemned, he was led away. No one cared that he died without descendants, that his life was cut short in midstream. But he was struck down for the rebellion of my people.
He had done no wrong and had never deceived anyone. But he was buried like a criminal; he was put in a rich man’s grave.
Isaiah 53:5-9
Easter is the celebration of how He rose from that grave, claiming victory over sin, suffering and death. It is a time to celebrate the opportunity we were given to spend eternity at His side, even though we don’t deserve it.
Isaiah 53 concludes with this:
But it was the Lord’s good plan to crush him and cause him grief. Yet when his life is made an offering for sin, he will have many descendants. He will enjoy a long life, and the Lord’s good plan will prosper in his hands.
When he sees all that is accomplished by his anguish, he will be satisfied. And because of his experience, my righteous servant will make it possible for many to be counted righteous, for he will bear all their sins. (That’s us!!)
I will give him the honors of a victorious soldier, because he exposed
himself to death. He was counted among the rebels. He bore the sins of many and interceded for rebels.
Isaiah 53:10-12
Life doesn’t get easier when you choose to follow Christ. At times, it may even become more difficult. The difference is, you can have a peace that doesn’t make sense for the moment because you KNOW you’re not alone in it. You KNOW that God has you. You KNOW that if he loved you enough to give His life for you, he’s not going to stop when things get tough. You KNOW that no matter what happens in this life, you will spend your eternity with Him! That’s all that truly matters in the end!
Jesus loves you more than you can imagine. His love for you is deeper than there are words to describe. It doesn’t matter what you have experienced or what you have done in the past. He loves you right where you are. There’s nothing you can do that can or will change that. If you would like to know the God that truly understands what you’re going through, the only one that chose to lay down his life for you, I encourage you to pray the prayer below.
Lord, I acknowledge my need for a savior. I can’t do this on my own anymore. Thank you for choosing to lay your life down for me and for loving me in a way I’ve never known. I ask for your forgiveness and I commit my life to you. Lord, help me to know who you are and guide me on the path you have for me. In Jesus’ name, Amen!
#JesusChangedMyLive